ok, just gave it a try from our restaurant for dinner, on the drive home (approx 10 mins) and no luck. this was just a spur of the moment "why not try it"

didnt do a reset, just turned BT on, and got the "pairing" screen and on the instrument cluster, but nothing by the time i got home.

ill try on a longer drive either tomorrow or on the weekend, and trying the iTunes theory as well.

i might be able to source another iphone and give it a crack, and a friend of mine might be buying a newer model BT unit, so if i can convince him to swap his with mine to test my theory, it might eventually work.

who knows, fingers crossed